Integrative Network Design Project Essay Example for Free

Integrative Network Design Project Essay The redesign for Kudler Fine Foods has covered the topology and standards and has defined the architecture, protocols, and strategies it will employ. Now security is the issue that needs to be reviewed. The most important aspect of any communications platform is that it is secure. This paper will discuss the security of the network and the details of the hardware choices that will be used in it. Security Hardware and Software Between every network and the outside host of threats there is a first line of defense. For almost every network this will be a firewall. A firewall can be both hardware and software and is usually a combination of the two. A firewall creates a barrier between networks. Any outside computer or client must pass through the firewall to access the network or its resources. Only a computer or system that has proper access can easily access a network protected by a properly configured firewall. Though it is not infallible, a firewall is the first and perhaps best means of security available to a network. The Kudler Fine Foods network will have firewalls installed and configured at each location. These firewalls will be designed to allow access from authenticated users inside the network. Communication outside of the network should be minimal and not available from unauthenticated sources. Customers do have the ability to access certain account information from the Kudler Fine Foods website. These accounts allow them an authenticated login to the webserver which can access the firewall and the specific account information behind it. Customers themselves do not have access to the network or its files. A truly secure network does not rely on a firewall alone. Individual devices still require their own security measures installed on them. The method of having each end user device be responsible for its own security is called Endpoint Security and many current forms of security systems use this ideology. Third party software can be installed that handles the actual endpoint security of the device. The important point is that each device has current software that protects against intrusion, viruses, and malware. Devices on the Kudler Fine Foods network will be installed with an application suite that will suit all of these needs. In addition to antivirus and antimalware software every device should have appropriate encryption. LAN vs WAN A local area network (LAN) is the most basic form of network; however the word local can be subjective. A local network can mean a small network in a home, or a business network covering several buildings on a city block. LANs are relatively fast, compact, and when configured correctly, have few errors or problems. The hardware needed to build an LAN is set up on OSI levels 1 and 2 and include devices like switches, bridges, hubs, and repeaters. Wide area networks (WAN) are complex networks that span large geographical areas. The most commonly known WAN is the Internet. WANs tend to be slower in speed, highly complex, and intolerant of system problems. Because of the multitude of connections on a WAN, even a simple down can create problems across the network. Fundamental Network Hardware All networks, whether local or larger, are built on the same types of hardware. Most of these systems are using Ethernet technology to connect them. Ethernet cabling uses twisted pair cabling to transmit data and connect devices with a universal technology. Networks use a system of routers, hubs, and switches connected by Ethernet cable. Routers are gateways between networks; these are frequently combined with other devices like a modem. Hubs create a connection point between sections of a network.  Hubs function by relaying frames received to all clients. Hubs are â€Å"dummy† technology in that they do not analyze the frames coming to them and do not relay them specifically to the intended recipient. Instead they transmit any received frame to all clients connected to them. This is a quick, cheap way of ensuring data is transmitted, but it does create large amounts of extra network traffic. A smarter and more expensive piece of equipment contemporary to the hub is the switch. A switch does the same function as the hub but is smarter than a hub. While hubs simply repeat their information to all clients, switches scan the frames that come to them and determine the recipient address. This way the switch can forward the frame to the proper client without tying up more network resources than necessary. Conclusion The Kudler Fine Foods network upgrade will be constructed on Ethernet technology, just as it is now. The fundamental construct will involve use of these hardware technologies and will include switches and routers. The three buildings are in different cities, so they will each have their own local networks. Each network has a connection to the other networks so they are connected by a wide area network at the same time. The devices at each location will be responsible for their own endpoint protection while each local network will be protected by a firewall.

Reacting against Victorian optimism and to the horrors of the 20th :: English Literature

Reacting against Victorian optimism and to the horrors of the 20th Century, William Golding chose to express his anti-Utopian views about humanity in Lord of the Flies (1954). Explore how Golding crafts his narrative in order to voice his philosophical views about man's essential illness. To what extent do you agree with his views? Golding's dystopian views of 'man's essential illness' are derived from his experience of 20th Century warfare. 'Lord of the Flies' is a fable in which Golding displays man's flaws inside a microcosm. This didactical work shows us that we have far to go, but there is hope. I will study his novel to discover his views, and will decide if I concur with them. Golding was born in Cornwall in 1911, and brought up in Wiltshire. His father was a teacher and a socialist and his mother actively supported the campaign for votes for women, so from an early age he was aware of social and political systems and their influence on people. During the Second World War, Golding joined the Royal Navy and took part in the sinking of the Bismarck and the Normandy landings on D-Day. His experience of the war had a profound effect on his view of the world. He learnt how brutal people can be. Although he was appalled by the evils of Nazism and the Third Reich, he said in an interview in 1963 that everyone was capable of inhumanity, not just the German or the Japanese. He saw Nazism as an evil system, and so horrifying that it could not be explained through reason alone. Later on he looked for an explanation in the nature of human beings, in their capacity for brutality and inhumanity. He read adventure stories such as 'The Coral Island', (1858), to his children, and wondered what would really happen to children stranded on a desert island. He took the idea of an innocent experience on an island and saw it in relation to the experience of Nazism and World War Two. In 'Lord of the Flies' Golding refers twice to R.M Ballantyne's 'The Coral Island'. The writer deliberately wrote 'The Lord of the Flies' in direct contest with the 'The Coral Island'. This is known because of an unpublished letter Golding wrote to his wife: 'Wouldn't it be a good idea to write a book about real boys on an island, showing what a mess they'd make?' Golding then went ahead and wrote the book to turn Ballantyne's simplistic assumptions and optimistic hopes on its head. Golding is even bold enough to use identical names as Ballantyne's for his main characters: Jack and Ralph in both books are protagonists, and are Reacting against Victorian optimism and to the horrors of the 20th :: English Literature Reacting against Victorian optimism and to the horrors of the 20th Century, William Golding chose to express his anti-Utopian views about humanity in Lord of the Flies (1954). Explore how Golding crafts his narrative in order to voice his philosophical views about man's essential illness. To what extent do you agree with his views? Golding's dystopian views of 'man's essential illness' are derived from his experience of 20th Century warfare. 'Lord of the Flies' is a fable in which Golding displays man's flaws inside a microcosm. This didactical work shows us that we have far to go, but there is hope. I will study his novel to discover his views, and will decide if I concur with them. Golding was born in Cornwall in 1911, and brought up in Wiltshire. His father was a teacher and a socialist and his mother actively supported the campaign for votes for women, so from an early age he was aware of social and political systems and their influence on people. During the Second World War, Golding joined the Royal Navy and took part in the sinking of the Bismarck and the Normandy landings on D-Day. His experience of the war had a profound effect on his view of the world. He learnt how brutal people can be. Although he was appalled by the evils of Nazism and the Third Reich, he said in an interview in 1963 that everyone was capable of inhumanity, not just the German or the Japanese. He saw Nazism as an evil system, and so horrifying that it could not be explained through reason alone. Later on he looked for an explanation in the nature of human beings, in their capacity for brutality and inhumanity. He read adventure stories such as 'The Coral Island', (1858), to his children, and wondered what would really happen to children stranded on a desert island. He took the idea of an innocent experience on an island and saw it in relation to the experience of Nazism and World War Two. In 'Lord of the Flies' Golding refers twice to R.M Ballantyne's 'The Coral Island'. The writer deliberately wrote 'The Lord of the Flies' in direct contest with the 'The Coral Island'. This is known because of an unpublished letter Golding wrote to his wife: 'Wouldn't it be a good idea to write a book about real boys on an island, showing what a mess they'd make?' Golding then went ahead and wrote the book to turn Ballantyne's simplistic assumptions and optimistic hopes on its head. Golding is even bold enough to use identical names as Ballantyne's for his main characters: Jack and Ralph in both books are protagonists, and are

Real Friendship

Real Friendship Friendship is really hard to find in our lives today, especially in this world because according to us nowadays it is known as the quality or condition of being friends or just simply having a friendly relationship. A friend isn’t someone you randomly meet and know them just for who they are. My belief of a real friend comes as fate. If it is meant to be then it will happen because a true friendship lasts forever through good times and bad times. A friend is someone who is honest and dependable when is needed in certain consequences. That is why I believe in Cicero’s theories of friendship because a friend is someone who: . Thinks alike. 2. Is honest. 3. And understanding. This essay of real friendship focuses on these three main ideas. Thinks alike. I have a friend who is known to be my best friend since kindergarten. She is humorously been my friend for fourteen years and I hope it continues through out life. But the thing about her is that she is very much like me although our lives are very different according to our families and I am very thankful that she has been able to control her life on her own. Cicero says â€Å"A friend is, as it were, a second self† (Cicero, 1971). I consider Cicero’s theory to be right because according to other friends that I have had in the past have never been even close to what I have with my best friend. The ethical idea or the golden rule, â€Å"Do to others as you would have them do to you† (Fieser & Pojman, 2009). Applies to my friend and me because we always treat each other with respect and we don’t talk behind each other’s backs. We treat each other like if we were sisters. Is honest. Being honest is the quality of truthfulness. Honesty is something that should be required in a friendship because you are able to express yourself about anything. I am certain that most people can not accomplish any problems without being honest because if you are not, it just brings more problems into your life. â€Å"Friendship improves happiness and abates misery, by the doubling of our joy and the dividing of our grief† (Cicero, 1971). This quote is very important and meaningful to me considering that my best friend is there for me when I need advice and she is honest with me about it. I would not like for her to be dishonest, due to the choices I can make with her advice, and then she would not be a real friend because I will be making bad choices. In the Core Morality, rule number three is do not lie or deceive. â€Å"Language itself depends on a general and implicit commitment to the principle of truth telling. Accuracy of expression is a primitive form of truthfulness† (Fieser & Pojman, 2009). Honesty exists in my friendship and I really appreciate it now that I know what real true friendship is especially because we are moral to each other. Understanding. To know something or someone you must understand it or them. Just like how I know my best friend, she knows me and therefore we understand each other. I treasure our friendship for the reason that it has last so long and how we are uncomplicated. We rarely have any problems with each other, but when we do have problems we fix them as soon as possible. We do not like to let problems pass by because we do not like to fight or make bigger consequences. We come to an agreement until we understand each other. I really like how we can always settle our disputes unlike other relationships that I had who were so called my friends. â€Å"Friendship is the only thing in this world, the usefulness of which all mankind are in agreement† (Cicero, 1971). Any action taken into our friendship has always been our words and we always depend on the right act. â€Å"A right act that is permissible for you to do. It may be either obligatory or optional† (Fieser & Pojman, 2009). I think we have constantly picked obligatory because it is moral rather than optional. As a result I am happy we are still friends, through thick and thin. In completion, Cicero’s philosophy on friendship is very convincing and true because I never really paid attention to it. It makes you realize a lot about who your real friends are and who are not.

Cause And Prevention Of Cancer Health Essay

Cancer is a word used for diseases in which unusual cells split without control and are able to assail other tissues. It ‘s cells can make other parts of the organic structure through the blood and lymph system. It is non merely one disease but many diseases. There are over 100 different types of malignant neoplastic disease. To recognize malignant neoplastic disease, it ‘s utile to cognize what happens when normal cells become malignant neoplastic disease cells. The organic structure is made up of many types of cells. These cells grow and split in a controlled manner to make more cells as they are necessary to maintain the organic structure strong. When cells become old or hurt, they pass off and are replaced with new cells. Despite that, sometimes this organized method goes wrong. The familial stuff ( DNA ) of a cell can go injury or misused, bring forthing mutants that concern normal cell growing and division. Equally shortly as this happens, cells do non decease as th ey should and new cells signifier when the organic structure does non necessitate them. Image coroneted Loss of Normal Growth Control. The image shows normal cell division and normal cell self-destruction or programmed cell death of a damaged cell. It besides shows malignant neoplastic disease cell division, through several mutant phases, stoping in uncontrolled growing.Types of CancerThe followers are the most normally known types of malignant neoplastic diseases. Bladder Cancer: It is a wild unusual growing and addition of cells in the urinary vesica which have busted free from the usual mechanisms of the organic structure. It has the capableness to multiply to other organic structure parts every bit good as to the lungs, castanetss, and liver. Breast Cancer: It is a malignant neoplastic disease that starts in the tissues of the chest. Endometrial malignant neoplastic disease: It develops when the cells that make up the interior liner of the uterus become unnatural and grows uncontrollably and it is the 4th most general type of malignant neoplastic disease between adult females and the most general gynecologic malignant neoplastic disease. Kidney malignant neoplastic disease: It forms in tissues of the kidneys. It includes nephritic cell carcinoma and nephritic pelvic girdle carcinoma. It besides includes Wilms tumour, which is a type of kidney malignant neoplastic disease that on a regular basis develops in kids under the age of 5. Leukemia: It starts in the tissue that forms blood. Lung malignant neoplastic disease: It is a consequence from a defect in the cell. Normally, the organic structure maintains a method of cheques and balances on cell growing so that cells split to make new cells merely when new cells are needed. Melanoma: It is a type of skin malignant neoplastic disease. It begins in cells in the tegument called melanocytes. Non-Hodgkin lymphoma: It starts in cells called lymph cells, which are portion of the organic structure ‘s immune system. Lymphocytes are in the lymph nodes and other lymphoid tissues. Pancreatic malignant neoplastic disease: It begins in the tissues of your pancreas which is an organ in your venters that lies directly to the rear of the lower portion of your belly. The pancreas secretes enzymes that aid digestion and endocrines that aid control the metamorphosis of sugars. Prostate malignant neoplastic disease: It is a barbarous tumour that consists of cells from the prostate secretory organ. Normally, the tumour grows easy and remains restricted to the secretory organ for many old ages. Throughout this clip, the tumour produces little or no symptoms.The Causes of CancerThe followers are the most normally known causes of malignant neoplastic disease. Tobacco: Harmonizing to the Nationwide Cancer Institute, smoking causes 30 % of all malignant neoplastic disease deceases in the U.S. and is to fault for 87 % of instances of lung malignant neoplastic disease. Not merely does it hold an consequence on the lungs, it can besides do kidney, pancreatic, cervical, and tummy malignant neoplastic diseases and acute myeloid leukaemia. Geneticss: It can play a big undertaking in malignant neoplastic disease addition. If you have a household record of malignant neoplastic disease, for illustration chest malignant neoplastic disease, taking extra safety steps is important. When malignant neoplastic disease is familial, a mutated Deoxyribonucleic acid can be passed down. Familial trials are offered for many familial malignant neoplastic diseases. Keep in head that if you have a household record of malignant neoplastic disease, it does non intend you will hold it. You merely have a greater opportunity of making it. Environmental Factors: The milieus you are in can do malignant neoplastic disease. Surveies have revealed that people who are exposed to high measure of benzine are at menace for malignant neoplastic disease. It is a chemical originated by gasolene, smoke, and pollution. Sun Exposure: Skin malignant neoplastic disease is caused by contact with the UV beams of the Sun. Sunburn or a sunburn is genuinely the consequence of cell harm caused by the Sun.The Prevention of CancerThe followers are the most known ways of forestalling malignant neoplastic diseaseAvoid Smoking and Exposure to SmokeSmoke is the most of import malignant neoplastic disease menace that we can cut down. It is to fault non merely for lung malignant neoplastic disease, but many other types of malignant neoplastic disease. One of the finest ways to avoid malignant neoplastic disease is to halt smoke or ne'er get down. The blink of an eye you quit your organic structure reaps the benefits of being tobacco-free.Practice Sun Safety and Recognize When Skin Changes OccurSkin malignant neoplastic disease is the most ordinary type of malignant neoplastic disease between work forces and adult females, and it accounts for about half of all malignant neoplastic disease diagnosing. The first measu re in forestalling skin malignant neoplastic disease is to remain off from UV beam contact. We can make this by have oning sunblock, avoiding noontime Sun, have oning defensive apparels when exterior, and by remaining off from tanning beds. Eat Your Fruits and Vegetables A well-balanced diet is helpful in many ways. A diet loaded with fruits and veggies to a great extent reduces the opportunity of developing malignant neoplastic disease and many other fortunes. Fruits and veggies hold antioxidants, which help repair our injury cells. Green, orange and xanthous fruits and veggies are the greatest opportunity to assist avoid malignant neoplastic disease. Surveies besides explain that dark fruits, like blueberries and grapes, may besides hold anti-cancer belongingss. Limit Red Meat and Animal Fat Several surveies explain that a diet high in carnal fat increases the danger of many types of malignant neoplastic disease, chiefly colon malignant neoplastic disease. Red meat holds much more fat than biddy and fish, so dropping the measure of ruddy meat in your diet may help to halt malignant neoplastic disease. A diet high in fat besides is chief cause of fleshiness, which is a menace for many types of malignant neoplastic disease. Restrict Your Alcohol Intake Devouring excessively much sums of intoxicant frequently increases the menace for several types of malignant neoplastic disease. Surveies propose that work forces who drink two alcoholic drinks per twenty-four hours and adult females who have one alcoholic imbibe per twenty-four hours well add to the menace for certain types of malignant neoplastic disease.Exercise for Cancer PreventionThe American Cancer Society advises exerting 30 proceedingss a twenty-four hours, at least 5 yearss a hebdomad for malignant neoplastic disease turning away. Exercise does n't hold to bespeak go forthing for the gym to raise weights. There are plentifulness of ways to acquire exercising into your twenty-four hours.Know what you ‘re being exposed to in Your Work EnvironmentChemicals in the topographic point of work may add to the menace of increasing many types of malignant neoplastic disease, plus kidney malignant neoplastic disease and vesica malignant neoplastic disease. Get Screened for Cancer Regularly Cancer testing trials can be helpful non merely for happening malignant neoplastic disease, but besides assisting halt it. Screening trials similar to the colonoscopy and Pap smear can observe unusual cellular alterations before they become cancerous.The Treatments for CancerThe followers are the most common interventions for malignant neoplastic disease Chemotherapy: It is the common term for any remedy refering the usage of chemical agents to forestall malignant neoplastic disease cells from increasing. It can acquire rid of malignant neoplastic disease cells at great distances from the original malignant neoplastic disease. Therefore, it is considered a systemic intervention. More than half of all people diagnosed with malignant neoplastic disease are given chemotherapy. For 1000000s of people, it helps handle their malignant neoplastic disease successfully, leting them to profit from full, originative lives. Radiation Therapy: It uses high-energy radiation to minimise tumours and kill malignant neoplastic disease cells. X raies, gamma beams, and charged atoms are types of radiation used for malignant neoplastic disease remedy. The radiation may be delivered by a device outside the organic structure, or it may come from radioactive affair located in the organic structure near malignant neoplastic disease cells. It uses radioactive substances, for case radioactive I, that pass through in the blood to kill malignant neoplastic disease cells. About half of all malignant neoplastic disease patients are given some type of radiation therapy sometime during the class of their remedy. Cryosurgery: It is the usage of utmost cold formed by liquid N to pulverize unusual tissue. It is used to handle external tumours, for case those on the tegument. For exterior tumours, liquid N is applied straight to the malignant neoplastic disease cells with a cotton swab or spraying device. Cryosurgery is besides used to handle tumours inside the organic structure. For internal tumours, liquid N or Ar gas is spread through an empty device called a call investigation, which is placed in contact with the tumour. The physician uses ultrasound or MRI to direct the call investigation and detect the freeze of the cells, therefore restricting injury to shut by strong tissue. A ball of ice crystals forms around the investigation, stop deading close by cells. Sometimes more than one investigation is used to direct the liquid N to different parts of the tumour. The investigations may be put into the tumour during surgery or through the tegument. After cryosurgery, the frozen tissue melt and is either of course absorbed by the organic structure, or it dissolves and forms an outer bed.

Fight Club and Marla Singer Essays

Fight Club and Marla Singer Essays Fight Club and Marla Singer Paper Fight Club and Marla Singer Paper You can mix the glycerin with nitric acid to make nitroglycerin, Tyler says. I breathe with my mouth open and say, nitroglycerin. Tyler licks his lips wet and shining and kisses the back of my hand. You can mix the nitroglycerin with sodium nitrate and sawdust to make dynamite, Tyler says. The kiss shines wet on the back of my white hand. Dynamite, I say, and sit back on my heels. Tyler pries the lid off the can of lye. You can blow up bridges, Tyler says. You can mix the nitroglycerin with more nitric acid and paraffin and make gelatin explosives, Tyler says. You could blow up a building, easy, Tyler says. Tyler tilts the can of lye an inch above the shining wet kiss on the back of my hand. This is a chemical burn, Tyler says, and it will hurt worse than youve ever been burned. Worse than a hundred cigarettes. The kiss shines on the back of my hand. Youll have a scar, Tyler says. With enough soap, Tyler says, you could blow up the whole world. Now remember your promise. And Tyler pours the lye. Chapter 7 TYLERS SALIVA DID two jobs. The wet kiss on the back of my hand held the flakes of lye while they burned. That was the first job. The second was lye only burns when you combine it with water. Or saliva. This is a chemical burn, Tyler said, and it will hurt more than youve ever been burned. You can use lye to open clogged drains. Close your eyes. A paste of lye and water can burn through an aluminum pan. A solution of lye and water will dissolve a wooden spoon. Combined with water, lye heats to over two hundred degrees, and as it heats it burns into the back of my hand, and Tyler places his fingers of one hand over my fingers, our hands spread on the lap of my bloodstained pants, and Tyler says to pay attention because this is the greatest moment of my life. Because everything up to now is a story, Tyler says, and everything after now is a story. This is the greatest moment of our life. The lye clinging in the exact shape of Tylers kiss is a bonfire or a branding iron or an atomic pile meltdown on my hand at the end of a long, long road I picture miles away from me. Tyler tells me to come back and be with him. My hand is leaving, tiny and on the horizon at the end of the road. Picture the fire still burning, except now its beyond the horizon. A sunset. Come back to the pain, Tyler says. This is the kind of guided meditation they use at support groups. Dont even think of the word pain. Guided meditation works for cancer, it can work for this. Look at your hand, Tyler says. Dont look at your hand. Dont think of the word searing or flesh or tissue or charred. Dont hear yourself cry. Guided meditation. Youre in Ireland. Close your eyes. Youre in Ireland the summer after you left college, and youre drinking at a pub near the castle where every day busloads of English and American tourists come to kiss the Blarney stone. Dont shut this out, Tyler says. Soap and human sacrifice go hand in hand. You leave the pub in a stream of men, walking through the beaded wet car silence of streets where its just rained. Its night. Until you get to the Blarneystone castle. The floors in the castle are rotted away, and you climb the rock stairs with blackness getting deeper and deeper on every side with every step up. Everybody is quiet with the climb and the tradition of this little ac t of rebellion. Listen to me, Tyler says. Open your eyes. In ancient history, Tyler says, human sacrifices were made on a hill above a river. Thousands of people. Listen to me. The sacrifices were made and the bodies were burned on a pyre. You can cry, Tyler says. You can go to the sink and run water over your hand, but first you have to know that youre stupid and you will die. Look at me. Someday, Tyler says, you will die, and until you know that, youre useless to me. Youre in Ireland. You can cry, Tyler says, but every tear that lands in the lye flakes on your skin will burn a cigarette burn scar. Guided meditation. Youre in Ireland the summer after you left college, and maybe this is where you first wanted anarchy. Years before you met Tyler Durden, before you peed in your first creme anglaise, you learned about little acts of rebellion. In Ireland. Youre standing on a platform at the top of the stairs in a castle. We can use vinegar, Tyler says, to neutralize the burning, but first you have to give up. After hundreds of people were sacrificed and burned, Tyler says, a thick white discharge crept from the altar, downhill to the river. First you have to hit bottom. Youre on a platform in a castle in Ireland with bottomless darkness all around the edge of the platform, and ahead of you, across an arms length of darkness, is a rock wall. Rain, Tyler says, fell on the burnt pyre year after year, and year after year, people were burned, and the rain seeped through the wood ashes to become a solution of lye, and the lye combined with the melted fat of the sacrifices, and a thick white discharge of soap crept out from the base of the altar and crept downhill toward the river. And the Irish men aroun d you with their little act of rebellion in the darkness, they walk to the edge of the platform, and stand at the edge of the bottomless darkness and piss. And the men say, go ahead, piss your fancy American piss rich and yellow with too many vitamins. Rich and expensive and thrown away. This is the greatest moment of your life, Tyler says, and youre off somewhere missing it. Youre in Ireland. Oh, and youre doing it. Oh, yeah. Yes. And you can smell the ammonia and the daily allowance of B vitamins. Where the soap fell into the river, Tyler says, after a thousand years of killing people and rain, the ancient people found their clothes got cleaner if they washed at that spot. Im pissing on the Blarney stone. Geez, Tyler says. Im pissing in my black trousers with the dried bloodstains my boss cant stomach. Youre in a rented house on Paper Street. This means something, Tyler says. This is a sign, Tyler says. Tyler is full of useful information. Cultures without soap, Tyler says, they used their urine and the urine of their dogs to wash their clothes and hair because of the uric acid and ammonia. Theres the smell of vinegar, and the fire on your hand at the end of the long road goes out. Theres the smell of lye scalding the branched shape of your sinuses, and the hospital vomit smell of piss and vinegar. It was right to kill all those people, Tyler says. The back of your hand is swollen red and glossy as a pair of lips in the exact shape of Tylers kiss. Scattered around the kiss are the cigarette burn spots of somebody crying. Open your eyes, Tyler says, and his face is shining with tears. Congratulations, Tyler says. Youre a step closer to hitting bottom. You have to see, Tyler says, how the first soap was made of heroes. Think about the animals used in product testing. Think about the monkeys shot into space. Without their death, their pain, without their sacrifice, Tyler says, we would have nothing. I S T O P T H E elevator between floors while Tyler undoes his belt. When the elevator stops, the soup bowls stacked an the buffet cart stop rattling, and steam mushrooms up to the elevator ceiling as Tyler takes the lid off the soup tureen. Tyler starts to take himself out and says, Dont look at me, or I cant go. The soups a sweet tomato bisque with cilantro and clams. Between the two, nobody will smell anything else we put in. I sa y, hurry up, and I look back over my shoulder at Tyler with his last half inch hanging in the soup. This looks in a really funny way like a tall elephant in a waiters white shirt and bow tie drinking soup through its little trunk. Tyler says, I said, `Dont look. The elevator door in front of me has a little face-sized window that lets me look out into the banquet service corridor. With the elevator stopped between floors, my view is about a cockroach above the green linoleum, and from here at cockroach level the green corridor stretches toward the vanishing point, past half-open doors where titans and their gigantic wives drink barrels of champagne and bellow at each other wearing diamonds bigger han I feel. Last week, I tell Tyler, when the Empire State Lawyers were here for their Christmas party, I got mine hard and stuck it in all their orange mousses. Last week, Tyler says, he stopped the elevator and farted on a whole cart of Boccone Dolce for the Junior League tea. That Tyler knows how a meringue will absorb odor. At cockroach level, we can hear the captive harpist make musi c as the titans lift forks of butterflied lamb chop, each bite the size of a whole pig, each mouth a tearing Stonehenge of ivory. I say, go already. Tyler says, I cant. If the soup gets cold, theyll send it back. The giants, theyll send something back to the kitchen for no reason at all. They just want to see you run around for their money. A dinner like this, these banquet parties, they know the tip is already included in the bill so they treat you like dirt. We dont really take anything back to the kitchen. Move the Pommes Parisienne and the Asperges Hollandaise around the plate a little, serve it to someone else, and all of a sudden its fine. I say, Niagara Falls. The Nile River. In school, we all thought if you put somebodys hand in a bowl of warm water while they slept, theyd wet the bed. Tyler says, Oh. Behind me, Tyler says, Oh, yeah. Oh, Im doing it. Oh, yeah. Yes. Past half-open doors in the ballrooms off the service corridor swish gold and black and red skirts as tall as the gold velvet curtain at the Old Broadway Theatre. Now and again there are pairs of Cadillac sedans in black leather with shoelaces where the windshields should be. Above the cars move a city of office towers in red cummerbunds. Not too much, I say. Tyler and me, weve turned into the guerrilla terrorists of the service industry. Dinner party saboteurs. The hotel caters dinner parties, and when somebody wants the food they get the food and the wine and the china and glassware and the waiters. They get the works, all in one bill. And because they know they cant threaten you with the pp, to them youre just a cockroach. Tyler, he did a dinner party one time. This was when Tyler turned into a renegade waiter. That first dinner party, Tyler was serving the fish course in this white and glass cloud of a house that seemed to float over the city on steel legs attached to a hillside. Part of the way through the fish ourse, while Tylers rinsing plates from the pasta course, the hostess comes in the kitchen holding a scrap of paper that flaps like a flag, her hand is shaking so much. Through her clenched teeth, Madam wants to know did the waiters see any of the guests go down the hallway that leads to the bedroom part of the house? Especially any of the women guests? Or the host? In the kitchen, its Tyler and Albert and Len and Jerry rinsing a nd stacking the plates and a prep cook, Leslie, basting garlic butter on the artichoke hearts stuffed with shrimp and escargot. Were not supposed to go in that part of the house, Tyler says. We come in through the garage. All were supposed to see is the garage, the kitchen, and the dining room. The host comes in behind his wife in the kitchen doorway and takes the scrap of paper out of her shaking hand. This will be alright, he says. How can I face those people, Madam says, unless I know who did this? The host puts a flat open hand against the back of her silky white party dress that matches her house and Madam straightens up, her shoulders squared, and is all of a sudden quiet. They are your guests, he says. And this party is very important. This looks in a really funny way like a ventriloquist bringing his dummy to life. Madam looks at her husband, and with a little shove the host takes his wife back into the dining room. The note drops to the floor and the two-way swish-swish of the kitchen door sweeps the note against Tylers feet. Albert says, Whats it say? Len goes out to start clearing the fish course. Leslie slides the tray of artichoke hearts back into the oven and says, Whats it say, already? Tyler looks right at Leslie and says, without even picking up the note, `I have passed an amount of urine into at least one of your many elegant fragrances. Albert smiles. You pissed in her perfume? No, Tyler says. He just left the note stuck between the bottles. Shes got about a hundred bottles sitting on a mirror counter in her bathroom. Leslie smiles. So you didnt, really? No, Tyler says, but she doesnt know that. The whole rest of the night in that white and glass dinner party in the sky, Tyler kept clearing plates of cold artichokes, then cold veal with cold Pommes Duchesse, then cold Choufleur a la Polonaise from in front of the hostess, and Tyler kept filling her wine glass about a dozen times. Madam sat watching each of her women guests eat the food, until between clearing the sorbet dishes and serving the apricot gateau, Madams place at the head of the table was all of a sudden empty. They were washing up after the guests had left, loading the coolers and the china back into the hotel van, when the host came in the kitchen and asked, would Albert please come help him with something heavy? Leslie says, maybe Tyler went too far. Loud and fast, Tyler says how they kill whales, Tyler says, to make that perfume that costs more than gold per ounce. Most people have never seen a whale. Leslie has two kids in an apartment next to the freeway and Madam hostess has more bucks than well make in a year in bottles on her bathroom counter. Albert comes back from helping the host and dials 9-1-1 on the phone. Albert puts a hand over the mouth part and says, man, Tyler shouldnt have left that note. Tyler says, So, tell the banquet manager. Get me fired. Im not married to this chickenshit job. Everybody looks at their feet. Getting fired, Tyler says, is the best thing that could happen to any of us. That way, wed quit treading water and do something with our lives. Albert says into the phone that we need an ambulance and the address. Waiting on the line, Albert says the hostess is a real mess right now. Albert had to pick her up from next to the toilet. The host couldnt pick her up because Madam says hes the one who peed in her perfume bottles, and she says hes trying to drive her crazy by having an affair with one of the women guests, tonight, and shes tired, tired of all the people they call their friends. The host cant pick her up because Madams fallen down behind the toilet in her white dress and shes waving around half a broken perfume bottle. Madam says shell cut his throat, he even tries to touch her. Tyler says, Cool. And Albert stinks. Leslie says, Albert, honey, you stink. Theres no way you could come out of that bathroom not stinking, Albert says. Every bottle of perfume is broken on the floor and the toilet is piled full of the other bottles. They look like ice, Albert says, like at the fanciest hotel parties where we have to fill the urinals with crushed ice. The bathroom stinks and the floor is gritty with slivers of ice that wont melt, and when Albert helps Madam to her feet, her white dress wet with yellow stains, Madam swings the broken bottle at the host, lips in the perfume and broken glass, and lands on her palms. Shes crying and bleeding, curled against the toilet. Oh, and it stings, she says. Oh, Walter, it stings. Its stinging, Madam says. The perfume, all those dead whales in the cuts in her hands, it stings. The host pulls Madam to her feet against him, Madam holding her hands up as if she were prayin g but with her hands an inch apart and blood running down the palms, down the wrists, across a diamond bracelet, and to her elbows where it drips. And the host, he says, It will be alright, Nina. My hands, Walter, Madam says. It will be alright. Madam says, Who would do this to me? Who could hate me this much? The host says, to Albert, Would you call an ambulance? That was Tylers first mission as a service industry terrorist. Guerrilla waiter. Minimum-wage despoiler. Tylers been doing this for years, but he says everything is more fun as a shared activity. At the end of Alberts story, Tyler smiles and says, Cool. Back in the hotel, right now, in the elevator stopped between the kitchen and the banquet floors, I tell Tyler how I sneezed on the trout in aspic for the dermatologist convention and three people told me it was too salty and one person said it was delicious. Tyler shakes himself off over the soup tureen and says hes run dry. This is easier with cold soup, vichyssoise, or when the chefs make a really fresh gazpacho. This is impossible with that onion soup that has a crust of melted cheese on it in ramekins. If I ever ate here, thats what Id order. We were running out of ideas, Tyler and me. Doing stuff to the food sot to be boring, almost part of the job description. Then I hear one of the doctors, lawyers, whatever, say how a hepatitis bug can live on stainless steel for six months. You have to wonder how long this bug can live on Rum Custard Charlotte Russe. Or Salmon Timbale. I asked the doctor where could we get our hands on some of these hepatitis bugs, and hes drunk enough to laugh. Everything goes to the medical waste dump, he says. And he laughs. Everything. The medical waste dump sounds like hitting bottom. One hand on the elevator control, I ask Tyler if hes ready. The scar on the back of my hand is swollen red and glossy as a pair of lips in the exact shape of Tylers kiss. One second, Tyler says. The tomato soup must still be hot because the crooked thing Tyler tucks back in his pants is boiled pink as a jumbo prawn. Chapter 8 IN SOUTH AMERICA, Land of Enchantment, we could be wading in a river where tiny fish will swim up Tylers urethra. The fish have barbed spines that flare out and back so once theyre up Tyler, the fish set up housekeeping and get ready to lay their eggs. In so many ways, how we spent Saturday night could be worse. It couldve been worse, Tyler says, what we did with Marlas mother. I say, shut up. Tyler says, the French government couldve taken us to an underground complex outside of Paris where not even surgeons but semiskilled technicians would razor our eyelids off as part of toxicity testing an aerosol tanning spray. This stuff happens, Tyler says. Read the newspaper. Whats worse is I knew what Tyler had been up to with Marlas mother, but for the first time since Ive known him, Tyler had some oval play money. Tyler was making real bucks. Nordstroms called and left an order for two hundred bars of Tylers brown sugar facial soap before Christmas. At twenty bucks a bar, suggested retail price, we had money to go out on Saturday night. Money to fix the leak in the gas line. Go dancing. Without money to worry about, maybe I could quit my job. Tyler calls himself the Paper Street Soap Company. People are saying its the best soap ever. What wouldve been worse, Tyler says, is if you had accidentally eaten Marlas mother. Through a mouthful of Kung Pao Chicken, I say to just shut the hell up. Where we are this Saturday night is the front seat of a 1968 Impala sitting on two flats in the front row of a used-car lot. Tyler and me, were talking, drinking beer out of cans, and the front seat of this Impala is bigger than most peoples sofas. The car lots up and down this part of the boulevard, in the industry they call these lots the Pot Lots where the cars all cost around two hundred dollars and during the day, the gypsy guys who run these lots stand around in their plywood offices smoking long, thin cigars. The cars are the beater first cars kids drive in high school: Gremlins and Pacers, Mavericks and Hornets, Pintos, International Harvester pickup trucks, lowered Camaros and Dusters and Impalas. Cars that people loved and then dumped. Animals at the pound. Bridesmaid dresses at the Goodwill. With dents and gray or red or black primer quarter panels and rocker panels and lumps of body putty that nobody ever got around to sanding. Plastic wood and plastic leather and plastic chrome interiors. At night, the gypsy guys dont even lock the car doors. The headlights on the boulevard go by behind the price painted on the Impala-big wraparound Cinemascope windshield. See the U. S. A. The price is ninety-eight dollars. From the inside, this looks like eightynine cents. Zero, zero, decimal point, eight, nine. America is asking you to call. Most of the cars here are about a hundred dollars, and all the cars have an AS IS sales agreement hanging in the drivers window. We chose the Impala because if we have to sleep in a car on Saturday night, this car has the biggest seats. Were eating Chinese because we cant go home. It was either sleep here, or stay up all night at an after-hours dance club. We dont go to dance clubs. Tyler says the music is so loud, especially the base tracks, that it screws with his biorhythm. The last time we went out, Tyler said the loud music made him constipated. This, and the club is too loud to talk, so after a couple of drinks, everyone feels like the center of attention but completely cutoff from participating with anyone else. Youre the corpse in an English murder mystery. Were sleeping in a car tonight because Marla came to the house and threatened to call the police and have me arrested for cooking her mother, and then Marla slammed around the house, screaming that I was a ghoul and a cannibal and she went kicking through the piles of Readers Digest and National Geographic, and then I left her there. In a nutshell. After her accidental on-purpose suicide with Xanax at the Regent Hotel, I cant imagine Marla calling the police, but Tyler thought it would be good to sleep out, tonight. Just in case. Just in case Marla burns the house down. Just in case Marla goes out and finds a gun. Just in case Marla is still in the house. Just in case. I try to get centered: Watching white moon face The stars never feel anger Blah, blah, blah, the end Here, with the cars going by on the boulevard and a beer in my hand in the Impala with its cold, hard Bakelite steering wheel maybe three feet in diameter and the cracked vinyl eat pinching my ass through my jeans, Tyler says, One more time. Tell me exactly what happened. For weeks, I ignored what Tyler had been up to. One time, I went with Tyler to the Western Union office and watched as he sent Marlas mother a telegram. HIDEOUSLY WRINKLED (stop) PLEASE HELP ME! (end) Tyler had showed the clerk Marlas library card and signed Marlas name to the telegram order, an d yelled, yes, Marla can be a guys name sometimes, and the clerk could just mind his own business. When we were leaving the Western Union, Tyler said if I loved him, Id trust him. This wasnt something I needed to know about, Tyler told me and he took me to Garbonzos for hummus. What really scared me wasnt the telegram as much as it was eating out with Tyler. Never, no, never had Tyler ever paid cash for anything. [,or clothes, Tyler goes to gyms and hotels and claims clothing out of the lost and found. This is better than Marla, who goes to Laundromats to steal jeans out of the dryers and sell them at twelve dollars a pair to those places that buy used jeans. Tyler never ate in restaurants, and Marla wasnt wrinkled. For no apparent reason, Tyler sent Marlas mother a fifteen-pound box of chocolates. Another way this Saturday night could be worse, Tyler tells me in the Impala, is the brown recluse spider. When it bites you, it injects not just a venom but a digestive enzyme or acid that dissolves the tissue around the bite, literally melting your arm or your leg or your face. Tyler was hiding out tonight when this all started. Marla showed up at the house. Without even knocking, Marla leans inside the front door and shouts, Knock, knock. Im reading Readers Digest in the kitchen. I am totally nonplussed. Marla yells, Tyler. Can I come in? Are you home? I yell, Tylers not home. Marla yells, Dont be mean. By now, Im at the front door. Marlas standing in the foyer with a Federal Express overnight package, and says, I needed to put something in your freezer. I dog her heels on the way to the kitchen, saying, no. No. No. No. She is not going to start keeping her junk in this house. But Pumpkin, Marla says, I dont have a freezer at the hotel, and you said I could. No, I did not. The last thing I want is Marla moving in, one piece of crap at a time. Marla has her Federal Express package ripped open on the kitchen table, and she lifts something white out of the Styrofoam packing peanuts and shakes this white thing in my face. This is not crap, she says. This is my mother youre talking about so just fuck off. What Marla lifts out of the package, its one of those sandwich bags of white stuff that Tyler rendered for tallow to make soap. Things wouldve been worse, Tyler says, if youd accidentally eaten what was in one of those sandwich bags. If youd got up in the middle of the night sometime, and squeezed out the white goo and added California onion soup mix and eaten it as a dip with potato chips. Or broccoli. More than anything in the world right then, while Marla and I were standing in the kitchen, I didnt want Marla to open the freezer. I asked, what was she going to do with the white stuff? Paris lips, Marla said. As you get older, your lips pull inside your mouth. Im saving for a collagen lip injection. I have almost thirty pounds of collagen in your freezer. I asked, how big of lips did she want? Marla said it was the operation itself that scared her. The stuff in the Federal Express package, I tell Tyler in the Impala, that was the same stuff we made soap out of. Ever since silicone turned out to be dangerous, collagen has become the hot item to I gave injected to smooth out wrinkles or to puff up thin lips or weak chins. The way Marla had explained it, most collagen you get cheap from cow fat thats been sterilized and processed, but that kind of cheap collagen doesnt last very long in your body. Wherever you get injected, say in your lips, your body rejects it and starts to poop it out. Six months later, you have thin lips, again. The best kind of collagen, Marla said, is your own fat, sucked out of your thighs, processed and cleaned and injected back into your lips, or wherever. This kind of collagen will last. This stuff in the fridge at home, it was Marlas collagen trust fund. Whenever her mom grew any extra fat, she had it sucked out and packaged. Marla says the process is called gleaning. If Marlas mom doesnt need the collagen herself, she sends the packets to Marla. Marla never has any fat of her own, and her mom figures that familial collagen would be better than Marla ever having to use the cheap cow kind. Streetlight along the boulevard comes through the sales agreement m the window and prints AS IS on Tylers cheek. Spiders, Tyler says, could lay their eggs and larva could tunnel, under your skin. Thats how bad your life can get. Right now, my Almond Chicken in its warm, creamy sauce tastes like something sucked out of Marlas mothers thighs. It was right then, standing in the kitchen with Marla, that I knew what Tyler had done. HIDEOUSLY WRINKLED. And I knew why he sent candy to Marlas mother. PLEASE HELP. I say, Marla, you dont want to look in the freezer. Marla says, Do what? We never eat red meat, Tyler tells me in the Impala, and he cant use chicken fat or the soap wont harden into a bar. The stuff, Tyler says, is making us a fortune. We paid the rent with that collagen. I say, you shouldve told Marla. Now she thinks I did it. Saponification, Tyler says, is the chemical reaction you need to make good soap. Chicken fat wont work or any fat with too much salt. Listen, Tyler says. We have a big order to fill. What well do is send Marlas mom some chocolates and probably some fruitcakes. I dont think that will work, anymore. Long story short, Marla looked in the freezer. Okay, there was a little scuffle, first. I try to stop her, and the bag shes holding gets dropped and breaks open on the linoleum and we both slip in the greasy white mess and come up gagging. I have Marla around the waist from behind, her black hair whipping my face, her arms pinned to her sides, and Im saying over and over, it wasnt me. It wasnt me. I didnt do it. My mother! Youre spilling her all over! We needed to make soap, I say with my face pressed up behind her car. We needed to wash my pants, to pay the rent, to fix the leak in the gas line. It wasnt me. It was Tyler. Marla screams, What are you talking about? and twists out of her skirt. Im scrambling to get up off the greased floor with an armful of Marlas India cotton print skirt, and Marla in her panties and wedgie Feels and peasant blouse throws open the freezer part of the fridge, and inside theres no collagen trust fund. Theres two old flashlight batteries, but thats all. Where is she? Im already crawling backwards, my hands slipping, my shoes slipping on the linoleum, and my ass wiping a clean path across the dirty Moor away from Marla and the fridge. I hold up the skirt so I dont Dave to see Marlas face when I tell her. The truth. We made soap out of it. Her. Marlas mother. Soap? Soap. You boil fat. You mix it with lye. You get soap. When Marla s creams, I throw the skirt in her face and run. I slip. I run. Around and around the first floor, Marla runs after me, skidding m the corners, pushing off against the window casings for momentum. Slipping. Leaving filthy handprints of grease and floor dirt among the wallpaper flowers. Falling and sliding into the wainscoting, getting back up, running. Marla screaming, You boiled my mother! Tyler boiled her mother. Marla screaming, always one swipe of her fingernails behind me. Tyler boiled her mother. You boiled my mother! The front door was still open. And then I was out the front door with Marla screaming in the doorway behind me. My feet didnt slip against the concrete sidewalk, and I just kept running. Until I found Tyler or until Tyler found me, and I told him what happened. With one beer each, Tyler and I spread out on the front and back seats with me in the front seat. Even now, Marlas probably still in the house, throwing magazines against the walls and screaming how Im a prick and a monster twofaced capitalist suck-ass bastard. The miles of night between Marla and me offer insects and melanomas and flesh-eating viruses. Where Im at isnt so bad. When a man is hit by lightning, Tyler says, his head burns down to a smoldering baseball and his zipper welds itself shut. I say, did we hit bottom, tonight? Tyler lies back and asks, If Marilyn Monroe was alive right now, what would she be doing? I say, goodnight. The headliner hangs down in shreds from the ceiling, and Tyler says, Clawing at the lid of her coffin. Chapter 9 MY BOSS STANDS too close to my desk with his little smile, his lips together and stretched thin, his crotch at my elbow. I look up from writing the cover letter for a recall campaign. These letters always begin the same way: This notice is sent to you in accordance with the requirements of the National Motor Vehicle Safety Act. We have determined that a defect exists . . . This week I ran the liability formula, and for once A times B times C equaled more than the cost of a recall. This week, its the little plastic clip that holds the rubber blade on your windshield wipers. A throwaway item. Only two hundred vehicles affected. Next to nothing for the labor cost. Last week was more typical. Last week the issue was some leather cured with a known teratogenic substance , synthetic Nirret or something just as illegal thats still used in third world tanning. Something so strong that it could cause birth defects in the fetus of any pregnant woman who comes across it. Last week, nobody called the Department of Transportation. Nobody initiated a recall. New leather multiplied by labor cost multiplied by administration cost would equal more than our first-quarter profits. If anyone ever discovers our mistake, we can still pay off a lot of grieving families before we come close to the cost of retrofitting sixty-five hundred leather interiors. But this week, were doing a recall campaign. And this week the insomnia is back. Insomnia, and now the whole world figures to stop by and take a dump on my grave. My boss is wearing his gray tie so today must be a Tuesday. My boss brings a sheet of paper to my desk and asks if Im looking for something. This paper was left in the copy machine, he says, and begins to read: The first rule of fight club is you dont talk about fight club. His eyes go side to side across the paper, and he giggles. The second rule of fight club is you dont talk about fight club. I hear Tylers words come out of my boss, Mister Boss with his midlife spread and family photo on his desk and his dreams about early retirement and winters spent at a trailer-park hookup in some Arizona desert. My boss, with his extra-starched shirts and standing appointment for a haircut every Tuesday after lunch, he looks at me, and he says: I hope this isnt yours. I am Joes Blood-Boiling Rage. Tyler asked me to type up the fight club rules and make him ten copies. Not nine, not eleven. Tyler says, ten. Still, I have the insomnia, and cant remember sleeping since three nights ago. This must be the original I typed. I made ten copies, and forgot the original. The paparazzi flash of the copy machine in my face. The insomnia distance of everything, a copy of a copy of a copy. You cant touch anything, and nothing can touch you. My boss reads: The third rule of fight club is two men per fight. Neither of us blinks. My boss reads: One fight at a time. I havent slept in three days unless Im sleeping now. My boss shakes the paper under my nose. What about it, he says. Is this some little game Im playing on company time? Im paid for my full attention, not to waste time with little war games. And Im not paid to abuse the copy machines. What about it? He shakes the paper under my nose. What do I think, he asks, what should he do with an employee who spends company time in some little fantasy world. If I was in his shoes, what would I do? What would I do? The hole in my cheek, the blue-black swelling around my eyes, and the swollen red scar of Tylers kiss on the back of my hand, a copy of a copy of a copy. Speculation. Why does Tyler want ten copies of the fight club rules? Hindu cow. What I would do, I say, is Id be very careful who I talked to about this paper. I say, it sounds like some dangerous psychotic killer wrote this, and this buttoned-down schizophrenic could probably go over the edge at any moment in the working day and stalk from office to office with an Armalite AR-180 carbine gas-operated semiautomatic. My boss just looks at me. The guy, I say, is probably at home every night with a little rattail file, filing a cross into the tip of every one of his rounds. This way, when he shows up to work one morning and pumps a round into his nagging, ineffectual, petty, whining, butt-sucking, candy-ass boss, that one round will split along the filed grooves and spread open the way a dumdum bullet flowers inside you to blow a bushel load of your stinking guts out through your spine. Picture your gut chakra opening in a slow-motion explosion of sausage-casing small intestine. My boss takes the paper out from under my nose. Go ahead, I say, read some more. No really, I say, it sounds fascinating. The work of a totally diseased mind. And I smile. The little butthole-looking edges of the hole in my cheek are the same blue-black as . a dogs gums. The skin stretched tight across the swelling around my eyes feels varnished. My boss just looks at me. Let me help you, I say. I say, the fourth rule of fight club is one fight at a time. My boss looks at the rules and then looks at me. I say, the fifth rule is no shoes, no shirts in the fight. My boss looks at the rules and looks at me. Maybe, I say, this totally diseased fuck would use an Eagle Apache carbine because an Apache takes a thirty-shot mag and only weighs nine pounds. The Armalite only takes a five-round magazine. With thirty shots, our totally fucked hero could go the length of mahogany row and take out every vice president with a cartridge left over for each director. Tylers words coming out of my mouth.

3 Sentences That Require a Tense Shift

3 Sentences That Require a Tense Shift 3 Sentences That Require a Tense Shift 3 Sentences That Require a Tense Shift By Mark Nichol Many writers seem to assume that all verbs in a sentence must be in the same tense, but the tense for each verb should be appropriate to the context. Here are three examples of sentences in which a statement about a past event should reflect a continuous state. Discussion after each sentence explains the reasoning, and revisions illustrate it. 1. He discovered that in order to extract all the good compounds, you had to brew tea for twenty minutes at 80 degrees. The discovery referenced in this sentence occurred in the past, but it describes something that was true before the discovery and during the discovery and will presumably remain true in perpetuity, so the verb pertaining to brewing should be in the present tense: â€Å"He discovered that in order to extract all the good compounds, you have to brew tea for twenty minutes at 80 degrees.† 2. For each area, they were then asked to indicate whether they believed their level of knowledge was adequate or requires improvement. The querying of survey subjects described here happened in the past. If the respondents were asked this question again, their answer might be different, but at the time the question was asked, the survey sought a response about the current state of their thinking, so the verbs pertinent to that state should be in the present tense: â€Å"For each area, they were then asked to indicate whether they believe their level of knowledge is adequate or requires improvement.† 3. Jones asserted that these attributes of confidence were important because executives and directors can use them to assess and advance their organizations along the journey to realize their vision. The attributes do not cease to be important just because Jones is not continuously asserting that fact. Barring an unlikely drastic change in the attitude of executives and directors toward them, they remain so, and the continuous state of this importance should be communicated by a verb in the present tense: â€Å"Jones asserted that these attributes of confidence are important because executives and directors can use them to assess and advance their organizations along the journey to realize their vision.† Want to improve your English in five minutes a day? Get a subscription and start receiving our writing tips and exercises daily! Keep learning! Browse the Grammar category, check our popular posts, or choose a related post below:50 Redundant Phrases to AvoidHow to Punctuate with â€Å"However†The Uses of â€Å"The†

What is Community-based Corrections and is it Effective Essay

What is Community-based Corrections and is it Effective - Essay Example The earliest American prisons were patterned after the English gaols which served as temporary places of confinement. The English gaols began to mushroom in England as places of confinement where prostitutes and beggars were beaten as punishment. The conditions in these gaols called bridewells were such that more prisoners died of sickness than execution. In 1779, the concept of penitentiary, a place where prisoners were given the opportunity to repent, was introduced by the prison reformist John Howard (Carlson & Garrett 2007 pp 7-8). Colonist America, together with Australia, later on became a place where the English threw their convicts. After the American Revolution however, new penal systems, not patterned after the English, were introduced. In the 1600s, William Penn, for whom Pennsylvania was named after, introduced the Great Law, a penal code which abolished all forms of capital punishment except for murder and advocated incarceration, fines and hard labor instead of violent punishments. After his death however, the previous Anglican Code of violent penalties reemerged until another prison reformer in the person of Benjamin Rush surfaced in the late 1700s and advocated the reformist point of view. The first prison group, the Philadelphia Society for Alleviating the Miseries of Public Prisons, was created (Carlson & Garrett 2007 p 8). The first prison in the US was located in Simsbury, Connecticut and was called Newgate which emphasized punishment and labor but numerous riots and other disturbances forced it to shut down. With the advent of the prison reform movement advocated by the Quakers, the Walnut Street Jail was established. The new penal system, called the Pennsylvania system, took a humanitarian approach to punishment where reforming the convict became the purpose of incarceration. Solitary confinement to induce prisoners to contemplate and